senior year

“What are you going to do after you graduate??” “Where do you want to go to college??” “Do you want to stay close or go somewhere far??” “What do you want to be??” These questions, along with many others, are things I’ve been asked countless times over these past couple of months.  To be quite honest, the answer to every single one of these questions is I DO NOT KNOW.  Yes, I understand that I have little time to decide.  Yes, I understand that many teenagers my age know where they want to go to college.  Yes, I understand the importance of picking the right college/major.

I’ll be a senior this year, which means that yes, I do need to start thinking about the answers to all of the questions I hate being asked.  Over the past year, I’ve grown to realize that your plan isn’t always God’s plan.  I’ve made so many plans that God has said no to, and that is okay.  What authority do I have to plan out “my” life when this life isn’t even mine to begin with?

If someone would have asked me two years ago what my life would be like now, I would have said something completely different than the way it actually turned out.  I’ve had heart break, pain, rejection, failures, so many ups but also so many downs.  I had in my mind how I wanted my life to be.  However, thankfully, God wrecked all my plans.

I’m so thankful that I don’t have control over my future.  I am a seventeen year old girl who has a hard enough time deciding what I want to wear everyday, I can’t imagine trying to plan out my entire future.  Even though my struggles and the trials I experienced were far from easy, God used those to completely change my heart.  He used my pain to shape me into the girl He wants me to be for this new season of my life.  I would have never wanted to struggle or hurt or pain, but my struggle was a part of God’s unique story for my life.  

How amazing is it that my future is already planned out?  The only thing I have to do is pray, trust, and listen to my Heavenly Father; so much less stressful than trying to do all this on my own.

So to all of you who have asked me these questions, my answer for you is: “Right now, I have no clue where God wants me to go or what He has called me to be.  Thankfully, I serve a God who already knows every detail of my crazy story.”

I’m excited to see how God works this year and I pray that my senior year is less about building my own kingdom, and more about advancing His.  I have no doubt that God will reveal to me every answer that I need to know, in HIS timing.  God is in control and I can not wait to see what He has in store!

For His Glory,